Beef

From Point83

Sub Paragraph A of the TOS Basic_rules RE: BEEF

1. All BEEF between members should be brought to the Forums (or at least the Internet) for airing and resolution. There is nowhere better than the Forums to bring your sensitive personal issues!
2. Romantic BEEF is no exception.
3. Under No Circumstances is BEEF to be dealt with offline or face to face over beers, campfires, bike rides, whiskey, safety, or lolz!
4. Under No Circumstances are members to communicate their BEEF to the parties in question before posting their BEEF to the Forums! The Internet is serious business, the Forums moreso than most. Conversation leads to confusion! Familiarity breeds contempt! BRING ALL YOUR BEEF TO US HERE AT POINT83. This is the proper place to deal with it.
5. BEEF is to involve as many members of the community as possible. BEEF will ONLY reach satisfactory emotional appeal once ALL other Members are involved! Conspicuously dropping hints in other threads is a GREAT way to continue conversation on the topic, pick up stragglers who may have missed your thread, and otherwise expedite satisfaction! So get the word out!
6. All posts and replies surrounding BEEF should be crafted from remote locations, usually at work or school, using text-only methods (See below: ALTERNATIVE METHODS) in the safety and comfort of your own home/classroom/bar/iphone. Preferably after a few drinks, alone, late at night, in your crappy studio apartment, while you're torrenting Season 4 of Battlestar Galactica in BlueRay. Remember: Be as forthcoming as you can! Don't leave anything out! If later you develop more feelings on the topic, please share them!
7. 3rd party participation in such proceedings is not merely allowed, but encouraged. The less directly involved you personally are, the more we want to hear your feelings on the subject!
8. Members bringing unresolved BEEF to rides definitely get a thumbs up. In such cases Members WILL adhere to Part 3, ride at opposite ends of the Peloton the whole night/ride/party, steadfastly ignoring one another in a passive aggressive version of the game "Chicken" until one of them quietly splits off for home. Bonus points go to the first one to make vague unspecific twitter/facebook posts about it!
9. Lengthy detailed posts and replies are encouraged. It's important that you are clear about ALL your feelings on the Forums. Please feel free to use examples, metaphors, parables, stories, myths, or plain old lies to illustrate your point! The substance and craft of such posts is not as important as emotive content, heartfelt appeal, or the ability to sway public opinion through sheer charisma, guilt, or personal influence - so don't hold back!
10. Be bold! The Forums are a busy place, and unless you go out of your way to express yourself vigorously, your opinions might go unheard or worse, un-respected!
11. Conflict_resolution WILL be handled via the TOS. No exceptions.
12. Beef has no expiration date, it is always encouraged to dredge up beef that is months old. This gives it time to properly marinate.
13. Sarcasm will not be tolerated
    
    
    

    Section 1: ALTERNATIVE METHODS:

    • Text messages, email, PM, Instant Messenger, Twitter, and Facebook ARE suitable text-only alternatives to talk about BEEF, however please remember the Forums are the preferred venue for such transactions.
    • "Alternate Methods" should be used to supplement and stimulate conversation on the Forums, not replace it. Everyone should have a chance to formulate and then communicate their feelings ON THE FORUMS. We cannot be clear enough on this point. Abandoning the Forums in favor of "Alternate Methods" to discuss BEEF is strictly forbidden.
    • When in doubt, bring your BEEF to the Forums where we can give it the attention and energy topics like this deserve.
    • It is customary, but not required, to introduce your BEEF on said forums by announcing "just how far up your ass my foot is going to go". This can be alternatively read as "GAME ON!"

    
    

    WARNING: "Alternate Methods" are inherently exclusitory and could impede the ability for EVERYONE on the Forum to first form an opinion and weigh-in on the topic. Though unlikely, it might even lead persons to violate rule 19, Sub Paragraph A, part 3 of the point83 TOS Basic_rules and I think we can all agree the problems with violating that rule are obvious! Sheesh.

    
    

    Carry on.

    
    

    (Part 12 in Sub Paragraph A of Rule 19 in the Basic_rules, is ALSO Rule 20 of the Basic_rules. Please familiarize yourself with the Basic_rules if you haven't already.)